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Thread: Issues

  1. Registered TeamPlayer
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    #11

    Re: Issues

    Its not just about an apology, all though that's always a good place to start, and I think there are at least 9 other people that need one too.

    It's about attitude and acting with honor and integrity vs like a coward and stewing.

    Just ignoring things and moving on may work for maf and his brothers, but that's the exception not the norm, and like I outlined in my posts, clearly something that was tired and isn't going to work here.

    The stuff that I mentioned in my posts about communication, criticism, teamwork, and resolving conflict is universal to team-based activities up to and including life.

    Short's silence speaks volumes, and I feel like I've said all I can / want to and can now move on playing with people that I enjoy and respect.

  2. Registered TeamPlayer MaFioSo's Avatar
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    #12

    Re: Issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr_Blonde_OPS View Post
    Looks like this can be closed Maf.

    Maf and Short you realize that the mentality of never saying sorry and pretending it never happened may work out for you and your family, but what happens if the other party doesn't think like that. Obviously Shen doesn't think like that. Why does Shen not deserve an apology for being TKed? Yea he came off like an asshole, not even on purpose, but did he deserve to be TeamKilled? In any TPG hosted game that would earn you a ban. Shen wants some resolution and instead is left with a cold-shoulder. Shen what decision does that leave you to make? I already know the answer and I think we can all agree that no one wanted that. A simple apology and explanation could have prevented all of this. Now since you just want to "pretend" it never happened, Shen is left with his decision of moving on the hard way...not being friends.

    Sorry, but I was brought up that you say sorry when you make mistakes. You don't ignore the situation and hope the other person forgets about it without ever getting an apology. It doesn't work like that especially when the other person isn't family or a life-long friend. Really a upsetting outcome.

    I don't believe Shen deserves an apology. Or if he does, than Short deserves one as well. it's not candid for someone to apologize and take the whole blame for their action when the other person also provoked it. Yes, Short may have crossed the line, but Shen was also disrespectful, maybe it was unintended, but any reasonable prudent person would have perceived it as disrespect. As I said, I've had Shen speak to me in the same manner, and I know I felt disrespected. I don't expect an apology from Shen, because I know how Shen is when we play and I know that he doesn't mean to be offensive. As I said, I don't think Shen should have spoken to him in that manner (Shen himself acknowledges that he sometimes crosses the line), and I also don't think Short should have TKd Shen (that definitely crosses the line and Short himself acknowledged this).

    I will say that I think Short should have responded to Shens PM's and resolved it. IMO, this is undoubtedly the best way to resolve disputes. However, I wasn't there during the conversation and I don't know if what Shen said warranted Short's refusal to speak to him privately.
    Last edited by MaFioSo; 12-04-13 at 12:26 AM.

  3. Registered TeamPlayer Mr_Blonde_OPS's Avatar
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    #13

    Re: Issues

    No doubt Shen should apologize and obviously Shen's apology was inevitable given that Shen tried to reach out to Short, but Short denied it. That's his right I guess. He can choose to do whatever he feels like. Though knowing the outcome of his decision to remain silent towards Shen I would think Short would want to talk to his friend Shen and resolve the issue.

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    #14

    Re: Issues

    Ill say it again.
    I'm sorry and apologize for anything that I say during a game that anyone feels crosses the line between constructive or warranted into something that sounds or feels personal, hurtful, or disrespectful.
    I'm sorry for all the times that I've done that in the past, and will actively try to prevent doing so in the future, but as I've said earlier in the post, miscommunication is inevitable and emotions run high during intense games. So I also apologize in advance for anything that I may say in the future. If and when it happens, I will apologize some more at the time.
    Also, just in case it wasn't clear before, I'm honestly sorry that I said something (still not sure what it was), that was so upsetting to short.

    Again, anyone that knows me or has spent time playing this game, I would hope knows that I actually do care a great deal about and respect the people that I play with regularly. If not, I'm saying it here again. You all and this community mean a lot to me. I love you man(s).

    Now as to your comment Maf, I think you're way off on this. I understand that Short is your friend and clanmate, but If anything I'd think that wearing that tag would impose a higher standard for your judgement.

    Implying that my WORDS and his ACTIONS before, during and after are even close to equivalent is flawed and incorrect, and any prudent and reasonable person would perceive it as so. Words, unless used to deliver a specific threat of action or somehow cause harm on their own are never equivalent in anyway to ACTIONS. What was the harm done by my words? They made him feel upset? What was the harm done by his actions? They ruined 2 games, they wasted the time of 9 other people, they hurt eveyone's rank, and i guess they made me feel upset too.

    You're a law student and a smart guy. What would happen if someone was being charged with assault and their defense was "I didn't like the things that the guy I hit was saying, so while he was saying some more things to other people I yelled obscenities at him. Amazingly this failed to resolve the situation, so i hit him. It's not fair that he's not also getting charged."

    You do Short a big disservice in implying that I somehow provoked / MADE him do anything that he's done. Ultimate Short is the only person that can make Short do anything. He's a grown man and implying that he has so little control over his emotions and only partial responsibility for his own actions is holding him to the standard of a child, and a pretty young one at that.

    And Blonde, I think that what's tripping both of us up in our disbelief / bewilderment of how short has behaved is based on an incorrect assumption that my feelings of friendship and respect where mutual before the event.
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    #15

    Re: Issues

    I am most def sorry for my action but at this point not at all towards Shen or blonde. After the second event i just decided to ignore you for a while since you where obviously still super pissed off at me as you can tell from the shit you guys have send and posted. Yes we had issues in game and for that i am sorry but after that i have not made a big deal, and was going to not play with you for a few days then have no problem playing with you guys after that. If you think you had some apology or something coming you ruined that starting this forum post. (Being public and slamming me in front of the community) All i have done was ignore you guys while you where super pissed an raging i don't think that's a big deal. I have no interest in responding to this post any further. You have taken me not talking to you for a day or so while you guys sent me rather insulting messages to be a bad thing - where i was looking at it i will not talk to them while we are still both so pissed.

    - I want you to know that you interpreted my silence just how ever you pleased and took that as some reason to send me shit talking messages about how im a baby and have a drug problem. I have not done anything but get a little angry in game and then let the dust settle, which would not have taken nearly as long had you guys not continued to be so hateful. I know you will say im playing the victim for saying this but im not i could care less its just part of the reason i rly never felt like saying anything to you guys.
    Last edited by ShOrT-ShOt; 12-04-13 at 02:32 PM.
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    #16

    Re: Issues

    Quote Originally Posted by ShOrT-ShOt View Post
    I am most def sorry for my action but at this point not at all towards Shen or blonde. After the second event i just decided to ignore you for a while since you where obviously still super pissed off at me as you can tell from the shit you guys have send and posted. Yes we had issues in game and for that i am sorry but after that i have not made a big deal, and was going to not play with you for a few days then have no problem playing with you guys after that. If you think you had some apology or something coming you ruined that starting this forum post. (Being public and slamming me in front of the community) All i have done was ignore you guys while you where super pissed an raging i don't think that's a big deal. I have no interest in responding to this post any further. You have taken me not talking to you for a day or so while you guys sent me rather insulting messages to be a bad thing - where i was looking at it i will not talk to them while we are still both so pissed.

    - I want you to know that you interpreted my silence just how ever you pleased and took that as some reason to send me shit talking messages about how im a baby and have a drug problem. I have not done anything but get a little angry in game and then let the dust settle, which would not have taken nearly as long had you guys not continued to be so hateful. I know you will say im playing the victim for saying this but im not i could care less its just part of the reason i rly never felt like saying anything to you guys.

    You just really don't get it.
    I know for a fact you've never seen me "super pissed and raging." I was pissed off right after you TK'd me, and then again the 2nd time when you abandoned a game. But, afterwards, more than anything I was confused, disappointed, and annoyed that this was even something that had reached that level.

    As for all this "talking mad" shit that's supposedly going on, I really don't see it. I see a discussion of exactly that actions and behavior that you've exhibited, and my honest assessment of it. There's a big difference between talking about the actions of someone who's ACTING SHITTY and talking shit.
    If you think that I have any of the facts wrong, please explain.

    Also, I never said ANYTHING to you either publically or privately about your drug problem. That's personal information that I know nothing about and don't care to. If it's true, it may help to explain some of what I've seen from you, but again, that's not something that I ever said to you or anyone else.

    I've only talked over steam msg to Blonde and Maf about this, and they actually initiated those conversations because you had already been msging them. I didn't say anything to either of them that I haven't also said here. So again, I really don't know where this big conspiracy of slamming and shit talk is coming from. Perhaps the same imaginary place that all my being mean to you in game came from.

    Another part of the reason why I started this thread was that I didn't want to talk behind your back or put other people in the middle of it and I was sick of hearing that you were doing it or attempting to with other people.

    This can be over if you'd like it to be. At this point I'm resigned to just never playing with you again, but you need to either respond to what I've said with some facts or stop making public accusations that what I'm saying is a personal attack or untrue.
    "Shen is being mean to me and talking mad shit bro" just really doesn't cut it.

    edit: one more thing....
    Also, I don't know what's gone on between you and Blonde in PM, nor should it really be discussed publically, but I will say that despite the way he's sometimes labeled by people that misunderstand him, he's one of the genuinely caring people I've met on here. I know that when this all started, his advice and motivation was all in favor of me working things out with you. THat this was not a big deal, and can and should be resolved. It's been pretty clear in his public posts that he's been trying his best to give you supportive advice and lay a path to resolution, but it seems as though you've also misinterpreted that.
    Last edited by Shenanigans; 12-04-13 at 03:27 PM.

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    #17

    Re: Issues

    If you don't think your original post was shit talk and the things you have sent me since where not talking shit then you have more issues than we need to discuss in this forum, like i said i am done with this forum and did not think it was the place to handle this issue in the start. At this point i could care less about you and blonde and what you have said i am says its why i never came to you to try and resolve the issues if you want example of what i consider trash talk i would be glad to make a list but i am not going to do so here so you can just say that i am playing the victim like you guys already have.

    You both said we should handle this like Men - If you would like to meet up let me know a time and place and i will take you 2 on 1.
    Last edited by ShOrT-ShOt; 12-04-13 at 04:01 PM.

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    #18

    Re: Issues

    Quote Originally Posted by ShOrT-ShOt View Post
    If you don't think your original post was shit talk and the things you have sent me since....
    No. Please point out what part was not just talk about shit that you had actually done and my opinion of it?
    Also, I've sent you 0 communication since my OP, so that's 100% a lie on your part.

    Quote Originally Posted by ShOrT-ShOt View Post
    ... then you have more issues...,
    Now you're saying that I have personal issue? What might those be? Perhaps you'd like to expound on your assessment of my personal qualities?

    Quote Originally Posted by ShOrT-ShOt View Post
    You both said we should handle this like Men - If you would like to meet up let me know a time and place and i will take you 2 on 1.
    Is this an invitation to a gay 3-way? If so, I'm flattered and I can respect that method of making up, but it's sadly not what I'm into.... well maybe if you're really cute... nah..
    Orrrrr... is that actually a physical threat and a bit of e-thuggery? If so, that's pretty silly.

    Sounds like it's time to close the thread before short makes more of a fool of himself or more attempts toTK people IRL.

  9. Administrator Kanati's Avatar
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    #19

    Re: Issues

    Yeah this is over. Take it private and you might want to move this back to private OGX territory.

    Krakkens and shit. stop tempting them.
    -- Bigdog

  10. Administrator Kanati's Avatar
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    #20

    Re: Issues

    And I might note that threats of physical violence will earn a very... very... long vacation. Not cool.

    Krakkens and shit. stop tempting them.
    -- Bigdog

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